you are not alone

You are not alone. How do these words resonate with you? Do you believe them to be true or do you think they’re merely words? Are you feeling alone right now? Does it feel as if your world is empty? Aloneness can present itself with many faces. It can be a feeling of detachment, of disconnect, or it can be one of deep sadness. Thoughts of loves long lost or never known. Abandonment, rejection, feelings of being overlooked, unwanted, are the scars riven across so many souls. When they linger long and heavy they create in us that state of aloneness.

Isn’t it strange that in a world of global communications where everyone has easy access to everyone else on the planet people never felt more alone? It’s as if the more we have the more our hunger grows. Today’s world emphasises the individual. And while this is necessary in so many areas of life it can also serve to disconnect. Its need for distance can feed into this sense of growing isolation. I want to be an individual, I want to be ME. I want to be different. That’s fine, but that means you get to be separate. You end up with the illusion of being alone.

Have you ever wondered why there are so many social networks, so many chat rooms? All around the world people are trying to reach out to someone, something, because they feel they are alone. They feel disconnected. It’s like something’s missing, like they’re not whole.

Ok. Let’s be more specific:
What is it that causes you to feel alone?

Is it something in your personal life that’s not working right now?

This can be any number of things. For instance you may be just coming out of a divorce. A harrowing and really painful experience for anyone who’s been there. No matter who’s right or wrong, everyone suffers. You’re feeling betrayed, by your partner, by life, by the system. You’re focusing on the mistakes you’ve made, on the great hope you once had for love and happiness that’s now evaporated.

Or is it your health that causes you to feel isolated? If you’ve just learned you have cancer then you’re feeling pretty crap. Maybe you need to have a serious operation and you’re worrying on that score. Mental illness and panic attacks can create an overwhelming sense of isolation.

On the other hand your feelings of separateness may be due to financial pressure. Perhaps you’ve just lost your job, been made redundant (what a horrible word!) You went into work this morning only to be told by your company you’re not wanted anymore. Of course it’s nothing personal, they need to downsize (another awful word!) it’s the economy.

But, you’re still not wanted.

Or, is it you’re facing eviction from your home, the mortgage company is repossessing? News like that feels like a real kick in the stomach. And it definitely leaves you feeling you haven’t a friend in the world.

It could be any of those, or something that’s uniquely personal to you that’s causing you to feel abandoned and unloved.

Still, you are not alone

Ok. So we’re looking for a cause, but it doesn’t have to be in the personal domain. Your reason for feeling alone may have its source miles away. You look at the world and see all the bad stuff that’s happening; wars, famine, earthquakes. It seems like a dangerous place alright. You see on your tv screens the riots in London, or the mass killings in Syria and you feel humanity has lost its way. The centre appears to have fallen out of the world. The economy everywhere seems to be in downfall. The news is full of natural disasters, earthquakes, prophecies of doom and gloom. 2012 is here alright.

Depending on how we look at it the world can seem like a very fearful place. And when we are fearful it can seem like we’re alone.

Still, you are not alone.

The divorce, job, your health, money situation, these are all real. We are not downplaying them. These are things you are going through right now and we honour you in your difficult times. But they are not the whole picture. You see, you are part of something far, far bigger than you, and this something is taking care of everything. As such I will be bold enough to say it’s impossible for you to be alone. I know that sounds strange, contradictory even. But it’s true.

You can feel as though you’re alone

Now that’s a very different thing.

You can feel alone anytime, even in the midst of a crowd. But that’s not the same as actually being alone. To decide you are alone is to separate from yourself which you can never do. Byron Katie once said, ‘the only meaningful relationship is the one you have with yourself’. How true. You cannot abandon yourself, wilfully anyway, and the Source from which you came can no more abandon you than the sun can the light which radiates from it, or the earth that which she yields.

Your sense of aloneness is a result of how you feel about what’s happening in your life right now. But it’s not the truth of your life. Same with the world situation, it’s the way you’re thinking about it that’s causing you to be fearful. In this case it’s not your feelings, but your thoughts that make you think you’re alone.

Our thoughts and feelings help create illusions about ourselves

They make us believe we’re unhappy, unloved, unwanted, whatever. Now of course these are all different ways of saying the same thing – that we’re alone. When we look at the world around us it can seem fragmented and disjointed. Everything is changing, passing away. There is much beauty, yes, but this too is transitory, nothing lasts. All changes and nothing is permanent.

But the everything you see is not really everything.

Try this experiment.

Look at yourself for a moment, your body. Look at your hands, your feet on the floor. Now look at something near you, it could be the table, the office chair, the wall, anything. And now try to become aware of the space between you and this object. I don’t mean the floor or the room or whatever connects you, I mean the actual space itself. Try to get a sense of the emptiness of it. It is the cracks in the everything that hold my interest. It is in this space that you find the nothing, which is everything. Not the everything you see around you, but the everything that is really Nothing. That’s fascinating. It is more the all than the every-thing. It is unbroken, not at two with itself.

And you are an integral part of it.

Aloneness is a state of mind. It is not about how many friends you have, or who’s sitting next to you right now. It is a choice you made because you've forgotten who you are.

And you are - a being of light. That is why you are not alone. At your essential core you are a very pure light, and this light contains all the knowledge that ever was, and all the experiences that ever were. You are one with the Source, the Origin, and so you are one with every other being that exists or ever existed.

So how do we experience this reality?

You begin by closing your eyes, going inside, and letting go of every thought that you are separate. You let yourself go into the light. When you know you are part of everything, and that that everything is really nothing, then you have truly come home. You are it. You are love. And,

You know you are not alone.

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There is a voice that doesn’t use words - listen!


Reality is merely an illusion - albeit a persistent one.

Albert Einstein