C. sections are a weird bunch. I know. I’m one!
They don’t get to choose their birth.
There are two kinds of sections, scheduled and emergency.
Now, depending on which kind you are the birth script can play out in different ways.
A scheduled section is simply that, a scheduled operation in which the child is assisted in coming into the world, whether they’re ready or not. The parents, in consultation with hospital staff make that decision. This child is spared the pain, or effort, of having to get out themselves.
There is no struggle.
No being crushed to death in the birth canal. Yippee!
Now this may seem like a good thing, but things are not always as they seem. No struggle means no effort. You see normally it’s the child who initiates birth, they come out when they’re ready. Later decision making may be a problem here. Being amazingly innovative may not come easy.
On the other hand, they may treat all struggle as unnecessary (which it is) and leave the difficult decisions up to others. It’s been noted by some that sections exhibit a certain air of tranquillity. Still doesn’t change the fact they were forcibly removed from their first home. It’s like being evicted! Now consider this. Someone hacks their way into this innermost sanctuary and wrenches you out. What the hell is that! Can you feel safe anywhere?
Perhaps the tranquillity is really something else.
I recall having nightmares until I was about three of someone slicing into me with what seemed like a bacon slicer.
Now emergency always signals danger. Something has gone wrong. Better call the fire brigade.
This is our second C. Section. No scheduling to have him out and all cleaned up in time for Aunt Petulia when she pops round for Sunday lunch. This one is delivered by the fire fighter.
There were complications.
There’s a problem with you.
You can’t breathe.
You can't get yourself into the correct position.
Basically you can’t do anything right.
In this case there is struggle. Too much. And to no avail. Effort is a hallmark. Effort without result.
So, in this instance birth comes as a relief, while at the same time a confirmation of failure.
The script runs ‘no matter how much I struggle I’ll never succeed. I may as well give up’.
Years later this can lead to feelings of wanting to be helped while at the same time being resentful of those who do. Sometimes this type has a difficult time finding love because love can seem like an intrusion.
All life contains some effort, some amount of struggle. Getting yourself born, battling your way down the birth canal is your first encounter with that and prepares you for all later battles.
But it can also teach you that life is struggle. That becomes your belief.
The lessons of struggle and effort are ones we need to learn carefully.
But it's not all bad news for this second type.
Because to "emerge", in its verbal form means to arrive, to have made it. It usually calls for celebration and champagne.
Both types in their own way have to deal with this idea of struggle, as well as making decisions.
I think I know which type I am.
C. sections are a weird bunch.
They are people without choice.
Also in this series:
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There is a voice that doesn’t use words - listen!
Reality is merely an illusion - albeit a persistent one.