all have things we’d like to be different; lose a few pounds, quit smoking, or
drop some habit that’s holding us back. Or it could be a new career, maybe
we’ve been in the same job now for years and a fresh start would open new
doors, new possibilities. Or take up a course of study, write a book, do
something to change the world!
Have you longed to start your own business but you’ve been putting it off? You just don’t seem to have time, there’s a fear at the back of your mind that you might fail, it could be telling you you don’t have enough money, or someone else has more qualifications in that area, and so you hesitate. These are natural feelings to have when facing into a new start in your life. I know I had them. When I got the idea to set up the uss I had all sorts of fearful thoughts that it wouldn’t work out. I couldn’t have been more mistaken!
It’s like we see the thing we need to change as attacking us almost.
However, embracing something new need not be threatening. Instead it can be a wonderful agent that facilitates us to grow into fully conscious and happy beings. Genuine change comes from the Greater Mind, or Higher Self.
Everyone makes New Year’s resolutions only to see them discarded by the second week of January. Actually it’s probably the worst time imaginable to make goals and plans. Why? Because it’s just a ritual everyone goes through that time of year. It’s a game we play, we set goals we have no intention of seeing through. We’re really giving ourselves permission not to change, to stay in our comfort zone, to keep talking about the changes we want to make without actually making them. It’s part of the cliché of the New Year.
As a consequence many people believe that it’s better to make life-changing resolutions at any time other than January 1th, as we have a better chance of sticking to them if we do. For some reason I favour September. Or at the beginning of Spring.
Make change a positive dynamic in your life. Too often we associate change with ‘giving up’ something, giving up smoking, giving up drink. Straight away that puts us into the mode of feeling we’re losing out.
If I'm overweight I must be eating too much, or eating the wrong foods, or I'm ugly, or I'm going to die of a heart attack. These are the stupid thoughts society feeds me and which, if I'm gullible I buy into. These become part of my mental chatter. I feel then I'm not "right" somehow. There's a lot of blame here, self-unworth. But this is completely the wrong way to approach change. It's the very antithesis of what personal development is about. The alterations you make must enable you in some way, they must add to your level of happiness and self esteem, make you feel better on all levels. It's not about the shape you are, whatever you are, you're perfect. It's about wanting to go beyond that.
We never change by wishing things were different, we change by seeing ourselves as the person we want to be. This can be a problem if you want to lose weight, because every time you look in the mirror you see a fat person staring back at you! And that reinforces the negative story. Begin by accepting yourself fully as you are right now. Then start seeing yourself as you want to be, and allow that you to emerge from within.
Now the amazing thing is when we do this, change seems to happen almost by itself.
The call to change mustn’t come from outside ourselves (that’s why I wary about New Year’s resolutions), it must always come from inside us, from that higher voice, that unmistakable voice that always tells us what’s right for us.
So, whatever change you want to make, picture yourself having done it. See yourself living it. The more you do this the more normal it will feel to you to be that way until one day you will just find yourself doing it.
Sometimes change can be exciting, other times it can be scary, more times it will be challenging. But it should always be welcomed. Embrace it. Go for the changes you want to make this year, go for the new you you want to achieve any time. Go for the amount you want, and not what someone else is telling you.
And do it fearlessly.
There is a voice that doesn’t use words - listen!
Reality is merely an illusion - albeit a persistent one.